A moment in time

I don't think we ever know when a moment will live in time....

As I was sitting outside in the sun, just soaking in the sunshine... I remember

When I was a young girl I observed my dad 'just" sitting outside....

Dad, why are you just sitting there doing nothing?  Honey, he said....

I'm just feeling the sun on my back.

Now I understand , how "just' sitting in the sunshine is so rewarding...

Thanks Dad !!!!

To be or not to be a .......bitch!

Im not sure when it happened but........Ive turned into a bitch!

I dont want to be a bitch .......I try real hard not to be ......but out it comes.

I wonder if I inherited this characteristic..........

It was bound to happen........I come from a long line of bitches....

Mother, sister, probably even my grandmother .......but she spoke only Italian so maybe it just sounded like she was bitching.

Or is it environmental.......I seem to be surrounded by idiots who get on my last good nerve.....that was kinda bitchy.

Sometimes I think I should become a hermit so I don't inflict my bitchyness on others .....

But than again....I heard it once said "Sometimes the only thing a woman has is to be a bitch!"

Good thing i have sons, from what Im told daughters will tell you exactly how big of a bitch you are!!!!

"Why do I bother"

So my mom calls me yesterday to apologize for being in a cranky mood the day before.

How are you doing she asks?

Great, just got back from a walk, I say.

Humm.... Let me ask you something she says.

Ok, I say.

You walk all the time, so why are you still fat, she says.

 I guess I eat too much, I say.

"I don't know why you bother " , she says.

I think "good thing she's in a good mood today"

Depression ....what is it good for....

 Depression.....What is it good for.....Nothing

Depression is a waste of energy..... Still depressed

Depression ... Focus on the positive....Still depressed

Depression....Count your blessings...Still depressed

Depression.....Get some exercise ....Still depressed

Depression.....Just let it go......came back, still depressed

Depression.....Useless emotion .....Still depressed

Depression.....out of my control....Still depressed

The hell with it, this is depressing.  

And the white rabbit said, follow me down the hole and I did

My sister has nicknamed me "the Quilting Ostrich" a name that is very be-fitting for me... I do bury my head daily, in my crafts, take a day at a time and am very happy with this agreement I have made for myself. You see, having and going through cancer treatment can and is overwhelming... But if I'm doing my crafts...I'm thinking wow this is great to be able to be creative... But if I'm doing "normal" stuff...cleaning, cooking, going to the store, etc...I'm thinking this is hard to do with cancer.... The reality sets in and then I am sad... On the other hand...my family does like it when I cook, me too... and its hard to argue a clean house and clean clothes.... Yet............"what's that?" I see and hear you material, yes!! lets do a project.............

Expectations from Others

It seems to me that when we expect others to act in a certain way, the way we expect, its trouble.

Hurt feels are sure to follow.  What I wonder is it wrong to have expectations?

I believe we all view the world from our own perception.  I sometimes try to look at the situation from "their" view and sometimes it works so you just agree to disagree and sometimes I just don't get it.

Relationships, what is it that bonds them together. Something has to click or resonate that holds them together.  So when people drift apart is that because its gone, how long should you hold on, waiting for something to click again?

Families..is it just the blood that holds them together after awhile?

Judgemental..... its a characteristic I dislike the most, and I find that I am becoming very judgemental...must stop

Time...I'm obsessed with not wasting time, but.......what who is to say what is wasting time,  writing in a blog might be concerned by some to be wasting time. I'm going stop now and bake some chocolate chip cookies....No one can claim that is a waste of time!!!!

Day by Day

As unrealistic it is to "live for today".... Sometimes all you can do is "get through the day"